knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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24

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Your momma's so fat she has fat rolls on her stomach.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

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How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

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Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

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In an alternate universe, Jake Sulley's brother did not die. The human race proceeded to strip-mine Pandora of all its mineral wealth, and slaughtered the entire indigenous population.

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What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

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A lady with alzheimers walks up to her friend and says" my nefew died today" and her friend replied.. " no he died three years ago."

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what did the blind orphan with no legs get for christmas? cancer.

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One white male lives in a city with all blacks. He puts up with gang violence nearly every day.

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How do you get four gay men on one stool? You get three more stools.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

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What is worse than the holocaust? World War III.

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what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get back before curfew.

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What's even worse than getting a parking ticket on your birthday? Child molestation.

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A woman says Renae has a butt... Two men say we don't care we have her hammer. True story.

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Why don't elephants smoke? Because they would be afraid of the fire, and they are much more adversely affected by recreational drugs than humans are.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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