A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears.

How did the cat die? I just it nine times

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

Your brother is so ugly that sometimes he gets teased at schools and comes home crying.

Roses are red, violets are blue my neighbor is black he will jump you too

What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink and then goes home and beats his wife.

It's April Fools Day... APRIL FOOLS!!!

What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

A man walks to a bar. The door was locked and had a closed sign so he walks away and goes home.

knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

what did max say to shelby? I hate black people.

A jewish man walks into a bar because he was thirsty.

What happens if you don't use a condom? The person you are sleeping with may get pregnant or contract some kind of STI or STD. In worse cases you or your partner may contract HIV or possibly AID's.

Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

what did the apple say to the banana nothing, bananas cant talk

What's a terrorists Favorite color Orange

if you have a name/nickname/brand/version or number, please like this anti joke

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

A black man owns his own night club. He tells the white man to look out for his night club. The white man bangs his head. The black man says, I told you to look out, you have now bumped into my big club that I take out at night time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...