How do you know if there is an elephant in your fridge? Well, because there's an elephant in your fridge.

Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

what did the short man say to the shoe? i sincerely hope that someone wouldn't try to carry a conversation with an inannnimate object, or else he is socially disturbed

What is green and has weels? A green bycicle.

What did the person do at the stop sign? Stop

Q: Why did Sally fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

why'd the baby cross the road it was stapled to the chicken

you will now laugh.

There once was a man from Peru, Who fell into an extremely deep sleep and woke up just before he choked to death on his shoe rubber.

What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy walking into a bar, A couple of multicultural friends grabbin' a drink.

Why did the little girl get a haircut? A; she has cancer.

Q: What happened to the blonde who tried to commit suicide? A: She died.

What's the difference between a wire fence and a wooden fence? You can't see through a wooden fence

U know what they say about big shoes? Big socks

What happened when the man rubbed the magical lamp? Nothing.

Your mom is so fat that when she went to the Doctors, He said she was slightly over weight

what smells worse then shit Drew White

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic, so to make his activities in the bar into a joke would be disrespectful and inconsiderate.

roses are red violets are blue i ate a peanut lets go have sex

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was crudely stapled to another chicken who insisted on doing so.

What's brown and sticky? Poo.

Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

What drink is dark yellow and freshly squeezed from one of the most healthy snacks? Piss.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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