this guy didnt get any pussy last night so go easy on him I I I V

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing, he was homeless

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Roses are red Violets are blue I picked them in the meadow this morning

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What's worse than a crying baby? A dead one...

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What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

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Why was the squirrel late for work? Because the traffic was nuts!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The POLICE, now open the god damn door!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Irrelevant. The road is no place for chickens.

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Sorry not thinking here, of course I will arrive sooner, give me 20 minutes or so (got to scout the area, you never know) As for coding, there is no hidden meaning so yeah... That is probably some "Neronist" coding format I never knew of I am using so well. Cant drive like this, so I will use a cab and wait for you at the back seat or something, I will let the Taxi cab honk the numbers of code here so you can come out knowing its safe. I sincerely thought you where at the home, according to our coordinates you are... Dont tell me that bastard built some basement over there, wow! I really miss him now, if nothing else because I would have liked a wine cellar made in less than... Sorry, ill be there asap, 20 minutes or less, nah, believe me, "fancy" is the least of things I want, and I wont be changing my mind anytime soon. See ya. I am sincerely surprised you even remember me, then again I look a lot like your crush. Abel (in case you where wondering, this is not my name either, but you get the picture by now)

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In Soviet Russia, it is the largest country in the world. A lot of the parts are uninhabitable though.

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he didn't have any arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Jimmy was a Potato.

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Q: Why is it sad that nobody was injured in a train crash? A: Because everyone died

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Q: Why was Sally crying? A: Because someone punched her in the face

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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Roses are red Violets are blue your mum is fat and so are you

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Whats the best part about 23 year olds? Theres 20 of them

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Jersey Shore

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Spread the net.

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Brians mother always told him to reach for the stars. He died the next morning.

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what do you get when a bear and a man mix a really pissed off bear and a dead man

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a registered six affender.

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Woof woof

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Why did the Mexican man jump to the floor? He had a stroke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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