Q: Do you know what Lady Gaga make for his birthday? A: A party

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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how do you make a dead baby float? take your foot off its head.

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What do two siblings have in common? They both want the other to get hit by a bus.

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how many Mexicans does it take to fix a light bulb? One, a Mexican can fix any thing.

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Moe: What's the difference between blue paint and red paint? Ben: I couldn't tell you, I'm blind. Moe was so embarrassed by his unintentional rudeness that he apologized to Ben and walked away.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes and noise and they are promptly found by the invading German soldiers. They are all shipped to Aushwitz where two of them are sent directly to the gas chambers where they are killed. The third Jew survives the Holocaust and is eventually liberated by Allied forces. He returns to his country only to find his house burnt to the ground. With no money or food, he starves to death by the side of the road and his body is eaten by various animals.

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Why did the chicken kross the road? It didn't because it was a highway and it got hit by a bus.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? NOT SALLY

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cook Pu. Ok then. Kelvin Yang.

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what do you get when you cross a scotsman who doe'snt know anything about football,and a indian who doe'snt anything about football .blackburn rovers , and a good night out.

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Do you wanna hear a Ebola joke? You probably won't get it

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. Are you a grapefruit? No.

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I picked them in the meadow this morning

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Why did the orange fall asleep? Because its never awake.

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What did the cast of sex and the city get for Christmas Nothing Sarah Jessica Parker is Jewish

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"Doctor! Doctor! It hurts when I urinate!" "you may have a kidney stone"

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knock knock go away

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Who was the first person Steven Hawking runs up to when he finds out something new about science? He is in a wheelchair due to a condition called ASL, therefore he cannot "run"

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing, he was homeless

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Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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