Two unemployed Irishmen are out looking for work when they pass a lumberyard. There's a sign outside that said "Tree Fellers Wanted". Sean turns to Patrick and says " What a curious way to write that sign. Surely the term is lumberjack?" "Yes," says Patrick "but what with the current economic situation here in Ireland, I say we get in there, apply for the jobs and hope that our lack of experience is overlooked." "Okay." Says Sean. "And let's not mention the whole sign thing." "No."

Q: What do you call 5,000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A tragedy worse than 9/11.

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy? Nothing. He's been dead for over three years.

A circus clown riding the cutest miniture Shetland pony both fall over a cliff and die.

what does a pickle and a computer have in common? ... they both have a mouse.

Your mother is so stupid that she has trouble discerning certain facts from fiction.

Me: f*** off Asshole: YOUR MOM! Me: -is dead.

What did Aaron Pfeifer say to Zach Faller ? Yee

A black teenager drives an Escalade His father is a prominent lawyer and his mother is a neuroscientist.

A cow walks into an Asian bar and asks for a beer. The bartender asks it for I.D. It says "it doesn't matter. I came by horse."

Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

Why is Pawn Stars the best show on the History Channel? Because Pawn Stars is the only show on the History Channel.

Yes, finally caught that mouse!

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? You haven't? Well neither has he

A Muslim walked out of a bomb shop.

What did the cheerleader get on Holloween? Raped.

What is worse than having sex with a dead baby in front of it's mother? Not a lot.

I have a sandwich and chips for lunch! But instead of a sandwich I have macaroni, and instead of chips I have no friends.

Q: What's fat and smelly? Q: What's worse than Nikki Manaj? Q: What's the bane of everyone and everything's existence? A: Kim Kardashian

If life throws you melons you might be dyslexic, but you also might not be.

Why did the mother have a club in her hands covered with red liquid? She spilled her bloody murry while playing golf.

You are so stupid you should go to school and get an education so you are able to get a well paying job in this tough economy

Man walks into a gun store, buys a gun. The same man goes home and lives happily till he dies of cancer. His son takes the gun shots himself, survives then later dies of cancer.

What do you call a Mexican on a boat? A sailor

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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