what do you call a baby that's just been crushed by a piano. a mess for a cleaner to deal with. think about his health. after that he might get a disease from the body and he might not get to sleep as it is a haunting sight.

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Why did the black man break a woman's ribs? Cardiovascular resuscitation is an emergency procedure often used outside of hospitals to revive unconscious individuals before medical professionals are able to intervene. Sometimes having your life saved comes at a cost.

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What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

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Knock, Knock Who's There A dyslexic kid with aides

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God bless America, and no where else.

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What has two legs, but cant walk? Steven Hawking

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Why doesn't Charlie Sheen take showers? Because he spends too much time on MySpace.

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how did the monkey fall out of the tree he was stupid how did the monkey get a black eye he was hit by a bus how did the monkey end up in the sewer he got hit by another bus

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Nippies

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whats red and black and green all over? a paint job gone bad

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What did James say when he couldn't find his car? "My name's James".

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what's the fastest way to have someone murder you tell your wife you are cheating on her

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Why haven't the Miami "Big Three" won a championship together? They don't play as a team. They rely on three people to score all their points when there are at least two other people on the court at all times. They jinxed themselves because they thought they were going to win every title until their contracts were up.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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the WNBA

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What did the banana say to the other banana? We're both marshmallows

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What does a rock become when it falls into the red sea? Wet.

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obama

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whats brown? poop.

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What did the four pigs do at the farm? Roll in mud.

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Shut up and stop laughing, Daddy's balls aren't gonna lick themselves.

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Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance addiction, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life and was apalled by his bad decisions.

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What did Obama get at the bar? A shot... In the head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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