Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

Your mom is so fat, when she sweats, it is more than the normal amount of sweat.

A man and woman was sitting at a bar. The man bought the woman a roofied drink and she has never been seen again.

What's Black white and red all over? Half a penguin

why didn't little johnny show up to school on friday? little johnny died two months ago from cancer. he hasn't been to school in a year.

What happened to the man who worshiped Satan when he died? He died.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

Why did Jack explode? He had a sneezier and his army friend Stephan threw a grenade at him because he was scared.

What do you call a Chinese person with a computer for a head? Dead because it is impossible for your heart to function with out a brain

Q: What do Obama and George Washington have in common? A: They are both intelligent, trustworthy presidents who truly care for what is best for the United States. Except for Obama.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To see his brother im dying of leukemia.

Me: Why are red onions actually purple..? Dad: I don't know Sister: *sarcastic* Well, Why is it rainy in London? Me: ....Because that's the weather pattern.

What has wings and flies at night? A black man with wings

so i turned on my radio.. so i could like listen to some tunes but like, it wasnt working and then like my best bud leaf was all like dude, thats a toaster.

What did the T-rex say to the velociraptor? Dinosaurs are extinct.

Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

asian, do math

MILEY CYRUS: ONLY GOD CAN JUDGE ME! ME: O GOD CALLED HE SAID YOUR A HOE TO

How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

http://attachments.conceptart.org/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=351301&stc=1&d=1208673890

A man walks up to a woman in a bar. They hit it off. That night they make wild sex and fall madly in love with each other. They start dating, it's so fantastic. They understand each other on almost every emotional and intellectual level. They have the same humor and they love spending time together. The sex is so great. After a few years, they get married, and they start the rest of their lives together. They have 2 beautiful children and their lives are blossoming. Fast forward 30 years. They are both retired old people, yet still madly in love. They live in their old home, and their lives are very comfortable. Their children have grown up into adults, and are very happy. Fast forward another 10 years, and they now live in an elderly home. They are both in wheelchairs and their health is slowly deteriorating. They die.

Q: What did one poor guy say to the other poor guy? A: We're both black

What did the downsyndrome get for christmas? Aborted

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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