What's white and very boney? A bone

thumb_up thumb_down +83

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Barrack Obama shops at Baby Gap

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

thumb_up thumb_down +53

why did the man blink because i put a gun to his head.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Why cant Hellen Keller Drive? Because shes a women.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

a blond, brunette, and red head run away from cops and hide in potato sacks. the officer went up to the brunette and kicked the potato bag and the brunette went "woof" "woof". the officer went to the red head and kicked the potato bag and the red head went "meow" "meow". the officer goes to the blond and kicked the potato bag and the blond went "potato".

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why did the chicken cross the street? It didn't. It got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did the Polar Bear say when he slid off the iceberg? Radio

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A minor walks into a bar. He's not very good at limbo.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Agricultural production fell significantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Shortest Joke in the World? Well, just look down.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the cripple kid get for Christmas? Cancer. You know what he got the next the next Christmas? Nothing he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How did the comedian end his show with a bang? He shot 4 people in the audience. It was a horrible sight and the remainder of the people in the audience were scarred for life.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why was Superman white? Because Jerry Siegel is a racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Q:Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple A:You have AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +37

a blind guy walks past a fish market and exlaims.. "it smells like a fish market"

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the chiocken cross the road? There's no such thing as a chiocken.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas Mittens

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops