Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, go ask the chicken.

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I told a woman to make me a turkey sandwich. Of course she complied since I was at Subway.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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What's the best position to be in while being attacked by a bear? invisible

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A Jew, a lesbian, and an Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender then cards them and sends them out because they're all under 21.

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair because he had cancer

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guess what Beethoven is doing right now. de-composing

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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What's the best part about Africa? Nothing.

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Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

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how did the dinosaurs die? they got old

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Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

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Why did the blonde buy a condom? Because she had a penis.

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What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

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WNBA

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Beacuse it was dead.

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A priest, a rabbi, and an atheist walk into a bar. They sit down and have a calm discussion about the differences in their beliefs.

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A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

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What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

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Q: What is green, blue, white and red? A: They're colors

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What's the difference between a Jew and Hitler? Well, I asked you so I don't know why you said "what?".

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops