An Irish man, a Scottish man and an English man walk into a bar ... The Irish man's a bit dim, the Scotsman's tight with money and the Englishman's a bit of a racist.

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What did the man with paranoid schizophrenia say? I suffer from paranoid schizophrenia.

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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what is poop in pee? bagel thins? tuesday.

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Why is there no African food restaurants in America? Because Africa doesnt have food to begin with

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There are two types of people in this world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

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Why did the man walk into a bar? Well hell I don't know I thought you might.

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One time i ate a sandwich it was good

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

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How do you know when a Mexican has died? Well based on the large mass of people inside and outside the funeral home who mostly seem to be of a mexican background and cultue, it would be safe to say that those are his/her friends and family who care deeply about them and therefore you could conclude that a Mexican person probably passed away. It's actually quite sad and going to be a rough few days for those closely connected to the person who died.

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Du bist mein Kampf

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What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree and lands on you, you'd die? A pool table.

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

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What do you do when you see a black man? The same thing you do when you see anybody.

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Knock Knock COME IN!!!!

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What did the Scorpio say to the Aquarius? "How's Uranus? Ohhhhh!" The Aquarius replied: "I have maggots."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he was dead.

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what did the black man do for his family? nothing

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A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

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Is that a threat or a promise? dragonflies

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What did the man say to the atractive woman? Hi

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Knock knock Whos there? D D who D's nuts!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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