An elephant and a rabbit sit on the forest floor and poop. The elephant asks the rabbit " doesn't it annoy you when the poop sticks to your fur?" "no" replies the rabbit. So the elephant picks up the rabbit and wipes his but with him.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

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I came.

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two fish are in a tank.

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Why does LeBron James keep his phone on vibrate? Because he is often in the company of others and he does not want a ringtone to distract others from the current topic of discussion.

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What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

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noodles

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How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody, you got ding-dong-ditched

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Why did the black guy walk into the supermarket and buy 100 bananas? Because he works at the zoo you racist!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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professor x walks over to wolverine with good news, he falls and dies of a severe concussion

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What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

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Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

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Q: where did the pickle live? A: In the desert

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Why did the Asian man have squinty eyes? He was looking at the sun.

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A black man walks into Best Buy and buys a Television full price.

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I have read the Terms of Service.

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Kim Kardashian's Marriage.

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Why did the baby cross the road. It was stapled to the chicken.

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Penis

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? A black Russian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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