What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interru--- MOO! I'm so sorry, I have Tourette's Syndrome and cannot control these sudden outbursts. Please continue.

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what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

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Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

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A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

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Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

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Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

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Why couldn't the kid get into the Pirate movie? He died in a car crash on the way there because of a drunk driver.

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What do you call Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ.

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

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What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

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An elephant walks into a bar. Except not really, it couldn't fit through the door.

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knock knock you may come in

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What is the difference between a bench and a mexican? the bench is an object

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A cat and a dog walk into a bar. The bartender says "it's refreshing to see perennial enemies enjoying each others company".

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What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

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How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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I LIKE TURLES.

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4 out of 5 Americans make up 80% of Americans

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One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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