Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

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What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

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Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

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what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

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What does the Priest say to the little boy? Size doesnt matter

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

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what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

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What is veiny, turns hard, and has a tip at the end? The male genitalia used as a reproductive organ mainly in sexual intercourse known as a Penis.

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roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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Why does everyone tell black jokes? Because everyone hates black people.

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What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

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a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

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Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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I asked her where you were.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my life didn't start, until I met you! :) Megan _____

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What's red and green and goes round and round? A kilt at a scottish dance

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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