John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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A guy uses Google locations to find his friend Chuck Norris.

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I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

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Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

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Why did Mr. Moseley choose to not buy crest toothpaste this month? Because your daughter got an abortion.

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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greetings ZOE. WHAAA BANNANNAS ROCK MAH WORLD. WHY DID THE TRAIN CRASH? ....BECAUSE THE CONDUCTOR WAS A PIECE OF CHEESE! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. WELL LOVE YA CHICAS. PEACE AND BLESSINZ. SALUTATIONS, isabel.

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A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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what has 4 legs but can't walk? a paralyzed dog

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Two men were patients at a mental institution. One was named Dave, the other named John. Dave very quietly said, "Hello, my name is Dave, and I have a violent form of phonophobia, so please do not-" "DICK!" Dave promptly strangled John. John had Tourettes Syndrome.

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Oh you have herpes? yeah, there's an app for that.

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Three fish swim into a bar. The first one says "blub blub blub". The second one says "blub blub blub". The third one says "I'm not a fish I'm a human". What does the bartender say? Answer = Ayy Llmao _George_Bush_

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How do you know when a Captcha defect causes you to post the same anti-joke three times? Canteloupe.

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what is the difference between the dead baby and the sandwich? i don't put my penis into the sandwich before i eat it.

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

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Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

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what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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