Q. Why does Hugo masturbate? A. To build muscle.

A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

Cracked.com the only (depressive) "humor" site.

What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

A Starfish walks into a bar. He sits down next to a man with a concussion. Q: What did the man say? A: Nothing because he was in a concussion and was no longer able to say words.

Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

Why did Michael Jackson like 24 year olds? Because they are apart of humanity and he had no reason to dislike them.

In 2012 at what age are Americans allowed drink? At any age. liquids are vital for human beings to survive.

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A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

Why don't chickens where pants? Cause they're animals,duh.

whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

amy copied adams haircut :0

What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

Did you hear about the woman you got hit by a car? The Driver was intoxicated and had no control over his faculties which cause him to careen off of the road and hit this poor soul as she patiently waited at a crosswalk.

What did the man say to hitler? hi hitler.

Why did the penguin cross the road? Chicken

What do you call a group of asians? China.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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