France never surrender.

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How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

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Why did Tigger look into the toilet? He accidentally swallowed a dime the other day and wanted to keep an eye out for it.

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What's grosser than gross? Grosser. What's grosser than that? Grossest.

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what color is blue? green

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

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If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

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a guy takes viatamins thinking they would help him be healthy he choked and then he died from choking on a jolly rancher

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A man was drowning in a lake and so he asked God to save him. A man on a boat came by and said to the drowning man "Do you need any help?" The drowning man said "Yes! Thank God a boat came for me!" So the man on the boat pulled the man from the water and saved him.

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One night a kid heard thunder and got scared. So he went to his parents bed and asked he could sleep with them. His mom said " Sure just don't look under the covers." He said okay and he looked under the covers and said " Daddy, why is your snake in Mommy's garden?"

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Life is like a box of chocolates, It doesn't last too long for fat people.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the Summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

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1+1= 69

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How do you confuse a blonde? £74.56.5 x 4^4^4^5 (7) : [15(68yf4+s)]

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You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

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Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

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Humpty dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty dumpty had a big fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men did not come to help him because the United States does not have a patriarchal system of government.

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Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What's black and white and red all over? A Giant Panda that has been killed by poachers.

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How many jews do you need to change a lightbulb? -One.

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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