A Chinese man and an African man walk into a bar. Its good to see so much multiculturalism in a usually racist society.

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What's one plus one? two.

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: my red painted d*ck

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What did spongebob say to patrick? Im ready! im ready!

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Non-Anti-Joke.com!

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

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Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

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To momma's missing so many teeth it looks like her tongues in jail

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Q: What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? A: One baby nailed to ten trees.

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roses are dead violets are gross guess what i'm in your closet

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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A man was walking through the woods when he comes across a little girl crying by a lake. "What is the matter little girl?" he asked. "My cat fell in the lake ... and it couldn't swim ... so my father jumped in as well and drowned too," she cried," Sad, the man sighed, pulled down his pants and said, "Well I guess today's just not your day,"

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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What do a porkchop and a watermelon have in common? They're both edible, organic, and delicious. Also, both are fun to throw at people.

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OMG I was sexting my friend and I accidentally sent my naked picture to my parents. What do I do? Tell your friend that you accidentally sent your naked picture to your parents.

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Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I f**ked your mom last night. Will you marry me?

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It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

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What do you call a black man driving an airplane? A pilot.

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So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

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"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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