Why are you here? Because i'm not over there!

A three legged dog walks into a saloon. He is quickly removed, as it was an establishment for humans and not for dogs.

...Jack Vale

Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

A rat scurries into a bar. Six days later, all of the people in that bar die of bubonic plague.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

What's funny? Women's rights.

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

What does a car and a t-shirt have in common? Nothing.

Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks." The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." They were moose tracks.

A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

Kim Kardashian.

What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

What do you call a gay, black, Muslim physician? Doctor.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

a man walked into a bar and said ow

Why did the cat cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...