2 loaves of bread were in a bar they did nothing as they are inanimate objects

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Why do mermaids where seashells on their breasts? They don't wear anything because mermaids don't exist.

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A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

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Yo Mama's so fat, she weighs more than an electron.

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What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

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Q:why did the chicken cross the road. A:to get back to the farm he was raised on

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I Love Hitler.

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i have cancer

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What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

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Who looks like Zach Efron? Shrek.

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Your mama's so fat that we couldn't catch the cancer early and it gave her crippling weight problem. I'm so sorry.

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Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

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What do you call 2 black men next to me. 2 Dead Men

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What's red and green? A frog in a blender!

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How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

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How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

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I'm Spartacus

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A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Laws are initially proposed in Parliament as bills. They become Acts after being approved three times by Parliamentary votes and then receiving Royal Assent from the Governor-General. The majority of bills are promulgated by the government of the day (that is, the party or parties that have a majority in Parliament). It is rare for government bills to be defeated, indeed the first to be defeated in the twentieth century was in 1998. It is also possible for individual MPs to promote their own bills, called member's bills; these are usually put forward by opposition parties, or by MPs who wish to deal with a matter that parties do not take positions on.

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was staples to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure

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black

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What did the Muslim do on 911? He weeped for the loss of his many good friends and relatives

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Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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