How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

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Whats Red and smells like Blue Paint? Red Paint.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

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Your mom is so fat, she has sleep apnea.

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A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

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What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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How is Stevie Wonder like Ray Charles? They are both talented musicians

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why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

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Lets see how many dislikes this can get.

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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Whats blue, sticky and glows only during the morning? IDK -Lets go Mets

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Robin, get in the car.

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How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

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Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

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Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

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Kenny G

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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women's rights

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A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

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What did one direction do? Nothing, their music is written by someone else they don't use whatever talent they have and they sound I million dying kittens.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

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Asians...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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