Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

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I've never seen a zebra use that crossing.

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A guy walks into a bar. I didn't see anything else.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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How did Bella fly? Very badly.

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I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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LET

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Want to hear a joke? 12 year olds

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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who needs to get a different hairstyle to his boyo? josh roberts

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Hey what did you do on The weekend??? I got hit by a bus!

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How can you tell if someones gay? You ask them.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

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A seal walks into a club.

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Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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