Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

hrih

how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

Knock, Knock. Come in.

Want to hear a joke? Me to...

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

Hi

A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

FIRE!!

well it rained all night the day i left, the weather it was dry, i can't remember the words but susana don't you cry oh susana don't you cry for me for i come from alabama with a banjo on my knee oh

a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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