What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

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vn[oiaehsobv[khpogjglprljffknfsiphgeknkldfekageriyreojgyperogerpojregkeporg? cuase u stupid and this stupid joke is to

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

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A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

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Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

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One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

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Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

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Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

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(in a retarted voice) i want to go to disneyland

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What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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What rhymes with you? You.

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26.5% of Americans are obese.

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What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops