Yo Mama is so stupid, she was riding her bike down the street when she was distracted and rode off a cliff. Oh crap I am so sorry.

A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

knock knock whos there ? Jordan Jordan who ? Jordan Walters

My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

88

Q: What did my uncle Tom say when he first encountered my friend Richard Jefferson? A: Hello

What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

Q: What is a African man with funny clothing and children straddling onto his back for dear life/ screaming in fear who only a few minutes ago before a particular incident made several young children cry and being chased by an authority figure? A: An intentionally inane circus performer partcipating in a scintillating rendition alongside his two children of who inadvertently frightened a small group of youth before he immediately decided to proceed by, during one of his extremely long, albeit few breaks, taking the members of his family on an interesting excursion to the nearby amusement park for occassional thrills. On the initial journey there, the black man, out of haste, accidentally dropped one of his children's most valuable toys of which elicited undeniably obnoxious bouts of sadness to come bursting out of his children's respective chests and an increased rate-of-travel for his wife of who accopanied him on his adventure and desired to assist him in his panic. In the spin of events, the man experienced an instance of hyper-activedness and spun out of control for a minute before eventually cooling down. Hence the screaming.

What's green and invisible? This cabbage.

My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

Where do bananas come from? Mexico

What is green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and onto your head? A pool table.

What did the black boy get for christmas? An Xbox.

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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