What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

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Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

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What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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Roses are red, Muslims are brown, When I see them swimming, I hope that they drown!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

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What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

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When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

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"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, the sky is grey so is the grass everything is grey, as i am colourblind

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What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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Q: What do you call a bathtub? A: A bathtub

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Q. Why do Puerto Ricans throw their trash away in clear plastic bags? A. So Italians can go window shopping.

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What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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