"You can't get past" "I'll get future" dad cri mom cri boy bang girl girl cri women's rites sholdnt exist.

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What do you call four black people in a car? A family road trip.

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Why did the man shoot himself? Because he already shot his wife.

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this joke is funny so dont read the rest even though there is no rest

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What is dull and has no point? A pencil without its point

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Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

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Why does a man wake up every morning to do the same job over again? Because, wait... what the heck kind of a question is that?

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? It is highly unlikely one would have a supply of dead babies large enough to answer this question.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

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Why was the girl sad on her Birthday? She found out she was adopted.

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what did the dead man say to the other dead man ...nothing he's dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

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How do you tell if someone likes butter? You ask them

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Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

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Why did Helen Kelley's dog run away I'd run away to if my name was. Ughgughgughgiggughfufh.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme oo

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After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

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why wont our kids have time to socialize? because theyll all be too busy trying to find a solution for global warming.

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Two pandas walked into a bar. The bar was in china.

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There are two kinds of people in this world: those that finish their sentences

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Q: Why does it snow in Canada and not in Mexico? A: Because Canada is far from the equator and Mexico isn't.

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knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

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What did the gay man see when he looked out the window? A UPS truck that was shipping a monkey

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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