how many horses does it take to piss on a cat 17 beccause rape isnt real in somalia

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Jellybeans

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Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why doesn't a chicken wear pants? Because, there are no tailors in the area who make pants suitable for chickens to wear.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a cage being carried by a farmer.

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

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Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

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What did Mars say to warn Prehistoric Earth before an asteroid hit it? Nothing, sound can't travel through space, it's a vacuum. The dinosaurs will be missed.

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Why did chuck norris die Brain tumor

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Two twins are born only a minute apart. There is a mistake at the hospital and they are seperated. Years later they reconnect on Oprah and realize they do not have much in common.

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If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

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Why don't midgets live in penthouses? They can't reach the button in the elevator.

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knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

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Why are rich people so rich? they're not poor.

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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A guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink and sighs heavily, waiting to escape the reality of his broken home, his cheating wife, and his high school dropout kid.

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How do you drown a blonde? Well there are a few ways, including holding her head underwater until she passes out and then leaving her in the pool.

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Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

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Everybody love food when they are hungry

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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What did the T Rex say to the pterodactyl? ROIRWR!!!

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Whats the difference between a nigro and a nigro... They are both BLACK!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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