Why is Cindy crying? She got a branch stuck in her eye which irritated her sensitive cornea so her tear duct produced a tear to help shed the material from her eye.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

whats worse than getting raped by your mom getrting raped by a giant scorpian

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. _._._

thumb_up thumb_down +49

No, we are all different, none of us are the same, you however, have no match, your ability to think influence and inspire even today, is unmatched. It is he who is unmatched, who stands alone.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What happens when you cross a vampire and a werewolf? A cross between a vampire and a werewolf.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why couldn't the black man swim? Both of his legs were just eaten by a shark.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

An Atheist and a Christian are walking along a sidewalk going in opposite directions when suddenly the Atheist sneezes. The Christian says "God Bless You!" Even though the Atheist doesn't believe in God he understand that the gesture was a kind one and so he nods and politely says "Thank you!" before going on about his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

There are 3 poeple on an air plane. The pope, a boy scout, and barak obama. The plane is about to crash and there is only 2 parachutes. omba said im the president of the united states and one of the worlds smartest african americans so he jumped out. The Pope told the boy scout " i lived a long happy life you take the last parachute and jump." The boy scout replied what there are still 2 left the " worlds smartest negro jumped out with my backpack.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why didn't the teen girl get to her appointment? A) She woke up late.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

It's April Fool's Day and a little boy runs up to his mom. "Daddy hung himself! He's in the attic!" The mom runs up to the attic, but the dad's not there. The boy looks at his mom and says, "April fools! He's in the basement!"

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's worse than bombs? Nukes

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How many Manatees does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, assuming Manatees have hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How do you annoy a farmer? Shoot his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops