Why was the boy's face red? He put his cat in a blender.

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So there's this one Cheerio who really likes this frosted Cheerio. He walks up to her one day and asks her out. She responded, "no I only date frosted Cheerios." The Cheerio then went and got a tutor, he became very, very smart and turned into a multi-grain Cheerio. He goes up to the frosted Cheerio and asks her out. "no, you're still not a frosted Cheerio." he gets a gym membership and works really, really hard and becomes and apple cinnamon Cheerio. He asks her out again, "no you're still not a frosted Cheerio." so he goes to church too and becomes a honey nut Cheerio. "no you're still not a frosted Cheerio." he focuses and tries even harder than ever before and finally becomes a frosted Cheerio. He asks her out, "will you be my girlfriend? I heard about this party this weekend we can go to." she answers, "I'll be your girlfriend, let's go to that party." So, they go to this party. The boy asks. "do you want anything to drink?" the girl says "sure maybe some wine." the boy en goes to the wine store. There's a super long line and he waits and waits but goes back to the party. He tells her and asks her if she wants anything else. "some soda maybe." he goes to the soda shop and there's another long line and he waits until he can't take it and goes back again. He tells h and asks her if she wants anything else. "some punch please." He goes to the punch store, and there's no punch line.

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What are the two sexiest farm animals? Consider that we are humans we shouldn't find any sex appeal in animals but if i had to guess I would say Brown Chicka Brown Cow

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. *knock knock* -Who's there? -Not Suzy.

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What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? Whatever their name is.

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Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

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How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

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What does the average fishermen catch Fish

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the man was talking to a phone no answered cause he talking to a brick wall

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What do you call a police woman who shaves her pubes? PC Marion Jones

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I have CDO it's like OCD but in the right order

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there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

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The Moon Landing.

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What's green and smells like a dirty whore? A dirty whore

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What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

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What looks like a black book but is actually white? I don't know because it can't look like a black book if it's white.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Recycling anti-jokes

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How many fingers am i holding up? 4

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what's the difference between me and callum ? a couple of miles.... and id like to keep it that way

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Several occupants leave as they realise the danger of the large animal.

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"Your invited!" "Invited to what?" "I can't tell but everybody you know." " He he."

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A Terrorist walks into an airport. - He then blows himself up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops