GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT GUESS WHAT i farted. : l

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What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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why was the the taxi cab driver having a bad day? because he wasnt making very much money, didnt get alot of customers, some of which were extremely rude, and his entire family just died.

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Whats the similarity between a bike and a black person? They are both stolen

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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Okay, yeah red, but you wont ever get to see it because you have gone stale.

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what did the palatiespussy say to the asain how many cocaines did i say was a black pankakkkke MMMFUUCCK NORDSTRUM(CUM)

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What's worse than breaking your leg and not being able to walk? Breaking your neck because you will most likely not be able to walk from the high probability of being paralyzed for the rest of your life.

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What happens when you yank on someones nuts? They cry

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wanna hear a joke? women rights. -ZombieUr

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? Nickleback.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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Wizard: If you could get any one thing in the world, what would it be son? Son: Another father that grants more wishes.

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Q: What did the monkey say to the parrot? A: I like trains so feed me bananas!

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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Hum... I am actually a redhead... Which is so strange saying to anyone including myself, I dye it like constantly.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a human profession, and the other is a type of fish.

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what's faster than an asian on a bicylce on payday? many things

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Q: On a plane, a black man does not grab a bag of peanuts, while everyone else does. Why? A: He has allergies.

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An Arab walks into a bar. He doesn't explode, and has a fun time with his friends.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your parents are dead, and so will you.

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What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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