Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun And you don't,

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-What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

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the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

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Why was the fat kid the last one to lunch? He'd had lead bricks stapled to his ankles by the skinny kids.

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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Cheese stick

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Why didn't Johnny get into college? Because Johnny is retarded.

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65% of people are starving 32% are over 190 lbs. Think about it

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You heard about that piece of shit that says no all the time? Yes, I bet you haven't though. no.

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Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? gang rape

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like your mom Give me some glue

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whats worse than the holocaust ? ms.brinkmann? noo close....a black guy trying toget a job.

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Why was little georgia afraid of the tea cup ? Because she was tripping over the holocaust.

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-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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Have you ever seen Hellen Keller's house? Well it was really nice.

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What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

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What did the anorexic girl say to the skilled psychologist? Fuck off you'll never understand me.

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? Its funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small. Also dinosaurs can't even talk!

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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