Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

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Your momma's so ugly, she has endure self-esteem issues relating to her appearance that have plagued her since grade school.

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Rebecca Black and Justin Bieber get married.... Friends and family attend the wedding

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A White guy, Asian guy, and Black guy walk into a bar, and the Black guy wins the joke, as to not be racist.

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The cast of the 'Jersey Shore' is the worst thing to happen to the Jersey shore

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Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

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how did the asian man get on the internet? by opening his internet browser just like everyone else

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A man walked into a bar and said "Ouch".

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Caller: Is your fridge running! Callee: ... umm yes? Caller: I guess you don't need my services. Thanks Callee: ok bye

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What happens when you cross a kangaroo and an elephant? Absolutely nothing. The two belong to entirely different animal families and their reproductive abilities are totally incompatible. A kangaroo could never fertilize an elephant, or vice versa. To suggest anything else is unrealistic and a physical impossibility.

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a man walks into a bar the other man ducks

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What do you call a partially deaf obese man? Anything you want, it's unlikely that he'll hear you. If he does manage to catch what you said, your chances of outrunning him are very good considering that he's likely to tire before you, unless you're overweight yourself of course. If this is the case then perhaps you should hit the gym, obesity is a growing problem in the Western world and greatly increases your chance of heart disease and/or diabetes.

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What is pink, female and has two dicks? A mother with two sons, both called Richard.

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My friend came in the barber's shop and asked me to cut his hair for him, i always have rude banter with him and i made a joke about his big bate nose. He acused me of calling him Jewish and threatened to sue me. This is how i found out that he was a white supremisist.

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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"Whats your favorite number?" "9." "Is it because thats your jersey number." "Thats my jersey number?"

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When life gives you lemons... Be thankful you're not starving, a**hole.

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Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

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How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her in the head.

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AWWWWWW YEEESSSS!!!

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How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

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Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

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Why did the dead baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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My mom told me to shut up because I was screaming as I was strangled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops