when your cable is on the fritz, you play video games instead. when you play video games, you get good. when you get good, you go to COD XP. when you go to COD XP, you lose to whiteboy 7th st. when you lose to whiteboy 7th st., you get into Skyrim. when you get into skyrim, you reenact cut scenes from skyrim. and when you reenact cut scenes from skyrim... ...you take an arrow to the knee... ...don't take an arrow to the knee. Get rid of cable.

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Whats Brown and fluffy ASIAN TITS

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Chuck norris is seen standing outside a bakery in Paris holding numchucks. He just finished lunch

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Q) How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? A)You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved. Q) Did you hear about the two guys who wanted to go to Paris? A) They didn't go! Q) Why did the boy throw his Television out the window? A) Cause it was completely broken. Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange. <<< This is the ultimate tough anti-joke Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Red paint. Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Presents.

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What do Bruce Lee and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both dead

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What is pink, female and has two dicks? A mother with two sons, both called Richard.

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Why are pineapples yellow? 82, piano, bomb, lamp!

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Why did the middle-aged black man lose his job? Because in this day in age, many businesses are being forced to lower their pay-roll, and he could no longer be afforded.

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What is the difference between you and a brick? A brick gets laid.

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A man walks into a bra. Bra kills him...

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Q: Where can you find a cat with no arms and no legs? A: Right where you left him Q: Where can you find a dog with no arms and no legs? A: In a bun

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What do you call a Chelsea fan on the moon? You don't call him anything... You call for help.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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My grandmother always said "slow and steady wins the race."...... She died in a fire

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We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

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Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

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What did tarzan say when he saw the elephants? Here come the elephants

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knock knock whos there? your neighbor, dude im sorry but i swear i didnt see your kid on my drive way.

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How do you get a blind man out of a tree? Yes.

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How did the baby cross the road? .......... It was stapled to the chicken.

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How did Debbie get a black eye? Because her dad asked her to take off her pants and she refused so he beat her

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why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops