What did the starving kid say to the starving parent? Pineapple

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning.

Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

What did the girl without arms get for her birthday? A pair of gloves.

How do you get Doctor Phil in a bikini? Give him a little alcohol to ease inhibitions and offer him a suitable bribe.

why do cats hate dogs the Holocaust

What do you call two dog? dogs

How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

Why is Justin Biber so white? there's nothing in the closet.

What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

My brownie is so warm and squishy. You know what else is warm and squishy? Freshly killed babyies

"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

knock,knock whos there? teddybear. teddybear who? a teddybear killed your family.

A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says "What the hell was that all about?"

Whoever said "don't start what you can't finish" hopefully didn't think about having kids Cuz that would be horror Get it?

Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

What did the Asian see when he went to Youtube.com? Youtube.com

Why couldn't the little girl swing? She didn't have any limbs.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

What happened to the boy after he ate a piece of Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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