Why did the penis enter the vagina? They were trying for a baby

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What's funnier than an knock knock joke???? Dancing narwhals pooping talking soup

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When im invisible you cant see me, i know

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How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

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Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

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Why did the black man die of leukemia? Overexposure to radioactive materials due to his career as a nuclear engineer.

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Your Grandma and your mom drove off a cliff, who survived? Both of them, they didn't drive off a cliff.

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Q:If Ryan Vallee walks into a room what do you do? A:Walk out -Ryan V

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What do you get when you cross George Bush and Barack Obama? Presidents.

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A women frantically calls the doctor and says, " Doctor, doctor, give me the news! I have a bad case of loving you."

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Two blondes were driving down the road. The blonde driving looks at her friend in the passenger seat and asks her to see if her blinker is working. So the blonde looks out the window and says, ''Yes. No. Yes. No.''

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Q.why did the woman die A.she left the refrigerator door open then left the kitchen

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What peels, is a fruit, yellow and tastes like a bannana? A bannana.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey was a dead. Don't you dare laugh. Asshole.

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How do you fit 4 homosexuals onto a barstool? You make the barstool wider allowing for all the men to sit more comfortably on top of the stool.

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Q: What can you never see in the light, but you can in the dark? A: Darkness.

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Once upon a time there was a nice old man who loved to ride his bike... He unfortunately died when he had a heart attack.

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A man is sitting at a bar. He stands up and goes over to these bikers playing pool. He then walks over to the bartender and says "I bet you three hundred dollars that I can pee in that bottle over there." The bartender looks at the bottle and sees there is a good five meters between the two. The bartender then agrees. The man takes out his penis and begins to pee. His pee stream goes everywhere on the bar, on the cash register, and espicially on the laughing bartender. It goes everywhere except inside the bottle. The man finishes and zips his pants. He then smiles at the bartender while handing him three hundred dollars. The bartender asks "why are you laughing you lost three hundred dollars?" Which the man replies "See those bikers by the pool table laughing?...I bet them five hundred dollars each that I could pee on your bar, on your cash register, and on your face and you would laugh and be happy." The bartender then reached under his bar and toke out his bat. He then continued to break the mans knees and then perceeded to pee on his bruised and battered face.

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How do you confuse a blonde? The same way you confuse a brunette or redhead, hair color has nothing to do with an individual's intelligence.

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whats the best thing ever to happen to chuk norris ? he was born !!!!

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What's the main difference between an angry white man and an angry black man? The angry black man is probably of African descent.

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A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

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Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great height she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

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A horse walked into a bar and ordered a drink. It was nothing out of the ordinary because the Everett-Wheeler interpretation of quantum mechanics is correct and he lived in a parallel universe in which the roles of humans and horses are reversed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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