1,984

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The Bible

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Why is your face? Because.

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What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

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Miss Polly had a Dolly who was sick sick sick So she called for the Doctor to come quick quick quick The doctor came with his bag and his hat And he knocked on the door with a rat-tat-tat. He looked at Polly's Dolly and he shook his head. He said she had leprosy and must have all her limbs amputated.

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How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

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How many Polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? My dad is dead.

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A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. There's a massive earthquake and the bar collapses to the ground, killing everyone inside.

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What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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why do bananas wear sunscreen? becuase they peel!

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It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

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What did the little orphan boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he had died six months prior to Christmas due to the horrible living conditions of the orphanage.

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Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

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What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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Knock knock ... KNOCK KNOCK ... I guess nobody's home.

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What's worse than being a Packer Fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... oh, wait....

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ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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What do you do when your dishwasher isn't working? Beat it senseless, and then tell your wife you need a new one.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops