It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between an elephant and I?Our mass.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

thumb_up thumb_down -11

If a rooster lays a brown egg on the south side of an Asian man's roof, which way would I turn at the intersection? Folderol, because laundry has no soul.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Why did the one-legged chicken say déjà vu? It felt a strong sensation that the current event had been experienced in the past.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -91

roses are white, violets are black, You should probably consult with an eye doctor, for you probably have severe color blindness.

thumb_up thumb_down -209

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

thumb_up thumb_down +108

A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

thumb_up thumb_down +78

385

thumb_up thumb_down +60

A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What do you call a pakistani that practices medice? A: Doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Billy fall off the swings? Because he had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Billy.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Baking a cake can be very hard and stressful, just like beating a slut with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

thumb_up thumb_down -164

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops