What do you call a hard working black man? A hard working black man.

Knock knock Who's there This is the police, open the door. I don't know anybody by that name

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

your mom died.

What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

do want to hear a joke? Women's rights

A man is gay, a parade is held in his honor. A man is black, a holiday is named after him. A man is white, he laughs at the stupidity in the world today.

What do you call a lazy good-for-nothing who can't succed at anything, steals your money, and who is unskilled in every way? A women

rosses are red voilets are pinkey your mams pussy is really stinky

What do you call a group of angry unemployed black guys? The NBA

Why was the Black Panther upset? Because racial tensions were high in the 60s.

What did the fat man with scissors do? Cut off the foreskin of your penis.

your mumma so fat she ate a horse and she still had room for dinner

Women's sports.

Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

Shoulda had a V8 ...or not because I am severely allergic to tomato's.

What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

Why did the Skyrim guard stop adventuring? He got cancer.

What is the secret to winning football games? Score the most points.

A duck quacks in a mountain range. No one on or nearby the mountains hears the duck because ducks' quacks don't echo.

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

why did the girl say what's up. she wanted to know what they were doing

Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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