- Anti Joke

Two Drunks walk out of a bar. They look down an alley and see a dog licking his balls. The first drunk says" Man, I wish I could do that." The second guy replies " Well you better pet him first."

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

Why didn't God show up to Jesus' bar mitzvah? Because he doesn't exist.

What did the girl say to the mute? "Why are you so quiet?" How did the mute respond? He flipped her off.

What is a dead cat on the side of the road. A free cat.

roses are blue violets are red i messed up so f... this s..t

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? Dr. Jeremy Brown, I have your results from the blood test. It's good news they came back negative. Hooray.

What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

What did the prisoner say to the man who posted his bail? Thank you.

How did the black guy get out of prison? Further evidence in the case was found which proved that the black guy was actually donating blood to a local blood drive for children with leukemia.

What do you call a zebra without stripes? A stripeless zebra.

I told a joke to my friends. They laughed.

roses are red violets are blue oranges are......

What is the least racist animal? A panda. It's black, white and Asian.

A child is watching Saturday cartoons when is father walks in and, the child is aware that the father was on an all night binge and is verbally abused

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Wheres my tractor?

What do you call a man who has been run over by a car? An Ambulance

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

Snarf Nuggets

Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

Three guys went barhopping. One slipped and broke his dick.