What happened to the blond that went to collage? She got her masters degree and became a brain surgeon.

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What happens when someone with ADD tells a joke? I forgot.

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Why was it true for sure? It was on wikipedia.

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Why is America so great? Because the continent is really large.

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Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they are all dead.

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Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One. This task does not require over 1 person to complete.

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Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

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Where do fat girls go to eat doughnuts? Jenny Craig

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Why can't Jimmy talk? He's dead.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

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A wife asks her husband if he can fix the sink and he responds with Do I have plumber written on my forehead. Then she asks him if he can fix the porch and he responds with Do I have contractor written on my forehead. So the husband goes on vacation and comes back to find the sink and porch fixed and he asks his wife how it is fixed and she says that the new neighbor helped. So she says the neighbor said he would only do it for cake or sex. The husband respond by saying Which one did you choose. His wife responds by saying Do I have Betty Crocker written on my forehead.

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Your mom is so fat, every time she swims in the ocean, north america sinks because of the high water displacement caused by her giant body mass. (V1-V2=m)

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What do a Penguin, and your best friend have in common? They'll both die if you shoot them in the head.

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i feel like when the radish was discovered someone was like "hey lets call it rad!" and another guy was like "lets dial it down a bit"

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There were 2 drunk men. Man 1:im planning to buy the world. man 2:you cant. man 1:why. man 2: cause im not gonna sell it.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its feet are both the same.

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i want justin beiber to release more albums so that i can not buy them

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Directions- I would be lost without you. Thank you for always being there for me.

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there is a mexican and a black guy in the back of a car, who is driving? The cop

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Thumbs this up

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1 friend request facebook: ignore. Nuff said

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What's silent but deadly? Limnic Eruption.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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