A horse walks into a mans house. The man wonders how the horse got into his house.

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Your momma so fat, she's fat

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Ebola How about you?

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Q-"what did the carrot say to the plant" A-"nothing because neither one of these objects can talk"

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Why did Margret eat the banana? She was hungry.

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What does 2 + 2 equal? 4

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

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What do you call a black person with dandruff.... A lamington

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What do you call a woman with a black eye and several cuts on her face? The police and perhaps a social help hotline. She now feels safer and more secure and will go on to lead a happy life thanks to you speaking out on her behalf.

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Q. What is black and nobody cares when they step on it? A. Asphalt

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey. Why did the other bird fall out of the tree? It was shot. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why did he have to die so young? It just isn't fair... In all considerations, the bullet didn't ask to become embedded in his skull either.

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A Jew! Bless you.

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A lady forgot to feed her goat. When she went to feed it, It wasn't there. Why? She didn't have a goat. Another lady forgot to feed her cat. When she went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? It died 2 days earlier. A man forgot to feed his cow. When he went to go feed it, it wasn't there. Why? They had ate it for dinner last night. A teenage boy forgot to feed his hamster. When he went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? He spent so much time playing video games that it ate itself. So the boy had his mom make him a sandwich.

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David Silberberg is gay

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A bench doesn't breathe, apparently Mexicans do.

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How do you find out how many Mexicans are living in the United States? Take a Census.

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Q: why did the cookie go to the doctor??? A: because he was sick

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Why did the koahla fall out of the tree? It died.

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What did Madeline McCann get for Christmas? Nothing she's dead.

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What starts with P and ends with orn? Porn

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What does Harry Potter love? Magic

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im typkiking wifrh myv troes. Sorry, i was typing with my toes.

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A black man rode down the street on a bicycle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops