Knock Knock? Who's there? The police The police who? I'm sorry mam but your husband is dead.

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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Why did the chicken kill itself? To get to the other side.

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What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

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Did you hear about the speed reader on top of the Twin towers? 90 stories 5 seconds.

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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Society.

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It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

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What is funnier than this joke? Jokes with higher ratings.

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A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

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What's the easiest way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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What did the Neo-Nazi say to the Jew? Hello.

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What is 6 plus 9? 15.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

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Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

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Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

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What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

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Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? If you eat a Jew, you're deemed a cannibal and are frowned upon by the majority of society.

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Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

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whats black and looks like a bucket a black bucket

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What do you get when you cross and unicorn with a loaf of bread? Cantaloupe

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Two men walked into a bar. The third man ducked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops