I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

You should periodically review the most up-to-date version of the Terms of Service. Oh you.

Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

A horse walks into a bar, it gets a concussion. -mattobrado

what do you do when a baby screams? shake it.

It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

What's worse than death? Nothing.

why did the girl cross the road ? to get run over by a flee of running cows

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Shoes, socks, and mittens.

What the black guy say to the Jew during the blizzard? I think it's snowing.

A man walks into a bar. - - - - - - - - -

Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

Three men walk into a bar. You'd think one of them would have seen it.

A: Knock Knock. B:Who's there? A: The IRS and Child Protective Services

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had an appointment with his hair stylist. Just kidding chicken don't have hair.

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

how Sudan answered England when England's ambassador eaten by Sudanese people? Eat ours

Where does a homeless person live? No where

How do you kill a baby quickly? The better question is why kill a baby quickly?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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