Yo mama so fat she doesn't need news, shes worldwide. ~YN~

I am darkness, soon I shall rule the world, those of you that desire to serve me thumb this up, those of you that desire eternal fear beyond your imagination, thumb me down. Moral: Try thinking of me and thinking "he is crazy", in order to unlock the secrets behind spontaneous human combustion.

If a rooster lays a brown egg on the south side of an Asian man's roof, which way would I turn at the intersection? Folderol, because laundry has no soul.

what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

What did Darth Vader say when he spilled his drink? Darth Vader is a fictional character and is not a part of humanity.

What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

Why am I losing my time writing this joke even knowing that I will get lots of thumbs down?

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had cancer and died.

Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

Q: Why did the little girl upset? A: Because she was part of the human centipede

What do call a black piano player? A pianist.

what did the dog do when he saw the flea?he ate it because he didn't know what would happen next

Why did the Black man cross the street? To get to the other side.

What did the blind boy get for christmas? harry potter transcribed in braille so he could enjoy such a magical world like the rest of us

What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

Have you heard about the new German microwave? It's a great labour-saving appliance that cooks food much more quickly than a conventional oven

What's brown and sticky? A penis.

So theres a priest, a rabbi, and an athiest on a cliff. They all remark at the beautiful view and take plenty of pictures with their respected families.

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Everyone is amazed because he can now walk.

Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

Did you hear about the speed reader on top of the Twin towers? 90 stories 5 seconds.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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