What did the headless man say? Nothing. The man can't speak because he doesn't have a head.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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You should periodically review the most up-to-date version of the Terms of Service. Oh you.

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a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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Yo mama is so fat!

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why dont black people like cruise ships? they already fell for that trick 400 years ago

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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i hate anti-jokes ;)

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A man walks into a bar. - - - - - - - - -

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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It was a stormy night and a stinking boy was running away from the co-op, he was clutching onto his pocket and constantly looked over his shoulder.... panting the boy reaches for a rusty door handle he opens the door quickly and shuts it behind him. "mam i got tea" said the boy "thanks david we will eat tonight for once" said a big chinned pharaoh.

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A man walks into a bar and asks "Where is your bathroom?" He is directed towards the restroom, where he then covers himself in toilet paper and calls himself a moose.

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What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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HEY EVERYONE THUMBS UP!

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Q: How does Lady Gaga like her meat? A: Exactly what her preference is.

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What is the difference between a joke, and an antijoke? A joke is actually funny.

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What is funnier than this joke? Jokes with higher ratings.

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I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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