What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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What's the difference between a duck A chair Vests have no sleeves

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

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What do you call a black man from Germany? A Germ.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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what did the cat say when he walked into a room full of dogs? Get meowt of here!

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Like CHUCK NORRIS, CHUCK NORRIS like You !

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What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

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hey

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Whats Brown and sticky... Shit

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Your mom's so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and foods with nutritional value!!!! Oh burn!!!!

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What did Darth Vader say when he spilled his drink? Darth Vader is a fictional character and is not a part of humanity.

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Whats the difference between a ham sandwich and a dead baby sandwich? I don't stomp on my ham sadnwiches with cleats before I eat them.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Yeah neither did she.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? There is no Santa Claus.

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Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

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a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

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Q: Why did the little girl upset? A: Because she was part of the human centipede

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

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Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

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A man walks into a pole.

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banana

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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