"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

thumb_up thumb_down -36

what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing you already told her twice

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -176

A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

thumb_up thumb_down +95

Moves Like AJgger- Marron 5

thumb_up thumb_down +81

What do the pope and an orange have in common? They're both fruits. Except for the pope.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do call a black piano player? A pianist.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Did you hear about the circus fire? It was intense

thumb_up thumb_down +33

ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?" then one of the costumers calls the health inspector and he shuts the place down because its not sanitary to have dirty horses in bars.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What did William Wallace say to Beyonce after Taylor Swift's performance? A: Nothing, because William Wallace has been dead for some time now.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why was the little girl afraid of the dark because she was brutally raped in the dark when she was 4.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

one day a grape was in the sun raisin

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Why do I staple a mans mouth to his penis. Because I wanted to

thumb_up thumb_down -53

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops