"Ask me if I am a Lemon?" "Are you a Lemon?" "Yes, ask me if I'm an Orange" "No, I'm a Lemon."

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Why did the pirate fall off his ship? He got pushed off by another pirate

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How does a spider write its diary entries every night? With a pen.

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Why did my cat die? I drowned it in the bath.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Whats the easiest way to solve problems in Haiti? Nuke them.

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A lamp of light That shines so bright Except when it is night A glow up high You wonder why It moves across the sky. What am I? A blogger who posts jokes on AntiJoke.com.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Everyone is amazed because he can now walk.

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What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

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What did the man say to his wife? We are both men. Apart from you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

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Why are so many children obese? Because they eat to much and they are not physically active enough

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Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

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There are two people in this world; people who finish their sentences and people who

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why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

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400 asian people walked in a bar

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Do you know what does Wikipedia says about Elton John ? It says that Sir Elton Hercules John, CBE (born Reginald Kenneth Dwight; 25 March 1947) is an English singer-songwriter, composer and pianist. He has worked with his songwriting partner Bernie Taupin since 1967; they have collaborated on more than 30 albums to date.

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Ask me if I am a cat. Are you a cat? No, what kind of stupid question is that?

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Ok, so, a big moose walks into a store and he looks around for potatoes but he cant find any. So he asked a worker, "do you know where the potatoes are?" and she says, "the potatoes are in aisle 3." So the moose goes to aisle 3 and there aren't any potatoes!

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How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

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A blonde is standing on the edge of a 20-story building. He's had a rather rough life.

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A man walks into a bar. He sees his wife with another man. That man is his brother.

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What does the cup-cake say to the cake? Do you want a cup in your cake to make it cup-cake?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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