Why did the black man die? He drove off a cliff.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

1,984

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A young girl falls off a swing, she is paralysed from the neck down and unable to walk every agian.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did my cat die? I drowned it in the bath.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Sheesh people! Stop insulting my last comment! Do not GO into my comment section, I do not WANT YOU to keep thumbing up those that call me pedo. Moral: Norway... you gonna call us all pedophiles? Please... besides I prefer them over nineteen... the downside is that they often got a couple of kids already at that age... Sigh...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A penguin is driving through Arizona when his car's oil pressure light comes on. He drops his car off with a mechanic who says he'll get to it soon, and to come back in an hour. The penguin leaves the garage and, seeing a Baskin-Robbins across the street, stops in and orders a dish of ice cream. As he eats the ice cream he reflects on the series of extraordinary events that led him to this place, this time, this situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your mams so fat that she has aids... and i gave it to her

thumb_up thumb_down -14

When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

I hate being bi-polar; it's awesome!

thumb_up thumb_down -60

A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

thumb_up thumb_down -178

how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A man walks into a bar, it looked like it hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What is Green and taste like an apple? An Apple

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Knock Knock! Hmm. I'm not expecting anyone. It's probably just a telemarketer, and I'm not very interested in purchasing anything at the moment. I won't answer it.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Dont look at me.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops