Roses are red Violets are blue But this is Italy So let me fuck you

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Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

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What did polyvore say to wanelo? Nothing They are apps

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A baby walks into a bar, the whole bar applaudes for the baby boy who just took his first steps.

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why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was a Women

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Roberto: Did you watch that WNBA game tonight?!? Will: No Roberto: Me either

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Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Jehovah's Witnesses.

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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Q: What do you call a guy that likes men? A: Gay.

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How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

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The chicken hesitated to cross the road. It pondered endlessly on the ramifications of not crossing the road, the future jokes that would never have been made. So it crossed the road with no real purpose for others to come up with unique ideas. Just kidding there is no proof that chickens have ever existed. There is proof that Barack Obama is a woman, however.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

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I've got a fever and the only cure is ibuprofen.

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What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

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Why did the black man get the grape soda? It was the only soda left.

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Bob fell off his roof.

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When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

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Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

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whats black and looks like a bucket a black bucket

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A dog walked into a bar. The bartender barked at the dog and the dog replied with, "I don't speak dog language."

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It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

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What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops