How do you make a baby spin? Put it in a blender and turn it on.

Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights

Roses are red Violets are blue My dad drinks a lot Help Me

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

Q: Whats worse than the death of flappy bird? A: The holocaust.

What's the difference between dead babies and ferraris? I don't have 17 ferraris in my garage.

What's the easiest way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

There are two people in this world; people who finish their sentences and people who

What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Hide him under your coat.

Why did the boy dress up as a zombie? Because it was Halloween.

Yo mama is so fat!

A homeless man comes home from work.

400 asian people walked in a bar

Why did child's mom cry when he was born? The child had no head.

Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

Why are blondes stupid? They are not. Its just in America society has been given that impression through inaccurate and crude jokes.

Q: What did William Wallace say to Beyonce after Taylor Swift's performance? A: Nothing, because William Wallace has been dead for some time now.

What is the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first one to walk on the moon... and Michael Jackson molested little children.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing. Muffins are incapable of speaking.

banana

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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